A shy hello

[Helios]

Hi Everyone,
My handle is Helios, and I am a PAIS raised as a male. I have hidden my medical backround for years (I am 23) and rediscovered it when I became sexually active (a lot of questions need answers) last year. I grew up thinking that I couldn't talk to anyone about this stuff and I was alone, only to discover last year that I was one of a group, and that gorp was called Intersex. I know we are a diverse lot, and no one is going to be exactly alike, but I have come on here to find a measure of comradrie I don't usually have. I hope one day that I can meet and talk to a PAIS person raised male, but who knows.
I found this website throug ha post made by WWW in 2006, and I'm afraid I have the same question.
Are there any suport groups for PAIS or AIS individuals in San Francisco. Are there any support gorups for intersex people, in general?
The more specific to my case the better.
Thank you, I look forward to posting wiht you all, and learning to be more comfortable socializing with my origin on my lapel, as it were.

- Helios

[des10ed2b]

you have come to the right place for support! lol. everyone here is very nice and supportive!

[Kailana]

I would of said try contacting ISNA, as they were based in SF. but they have closed shop apparently. You might be able to find IS related suupport groups through one of the LGBT medical centers, I believe that are present in SF. I mean there should be staff there that could provide you a contact to or for intersex support groups tha are local to your area. SF is a big city and should have a support group, I thought there was an active publicly attended support group in that area.

Best of luck to you, and welcome to BLO, also nice that you stopped by, meaning its good to see new people and to help if I/we can.

[Helios]

Thank you both. Especially for the advise. I have tried that method, and the most I have found is a transgender/intersex group of which I am the only intersex individual. I will keep searching.
I'd like to stick around if that's ok. Is posting lively around here these days?
I'd like to get used to what people normally talk about before I burst in with a topic. If people don't do much discussion anymore, I'll not shout down an empty well.

[Kailana]

depends on who stops by, typically there could be as little as 5 posts, or as much as 100. Depends on how important of a topic is brought up, or how relevant it is too other people. Lots of the guests you see who are reading posts and threads are BLO group members, but they only log on if they really see someone or a comment that they think is important to them.

Now there is about 20 of us or so, who are fairly regular posters, welcomers, we seem to be a little more active at least in saying hello, or how can we help, not that I am perfect about doing that, sometimes i get busy with life and might forget to stop by, but i do try.

I am happy to hear that at least you went to the TS/IS group, sorry to hear you were the only IS person there. It could be that group is the only open support group for both available. I would keep trying though. Perhaps look for IS activities, protests support activities, could be you need to meet the right people, IS activists in the area, and introduce yourself to some of them. Maybe Check college campus's too. Talk to some of the Gender Studies professors, they are likely to have some contacts that they might be able to share with you, or perhaps share your contact information with them, if privacy is an issue.

Keep trying though, i am sure your gonna meet someone who will get you headed in the right direction.

[Kailana]

alot of topics have allready been discussed at some point, but they are so far back that you really have to dig to find them. It's best to ask away, and see what people have to say these days. It can lead to some great opportunitues to hear how others feel, or what knowledge they are able to share. Do your best not to worry what others think, we are all different, with a variety of conditions, so know exact may suit your needs. But, with the shared knowledge availably, you might find something usefull, benefitial to you. Plus all the other hangers on the guests, might find some of the discussion of use to them or to there own understanding.

thanks again for posting

[EZsquirt]

Hey Helios, i'm new here too. I have a male upper half, and my lower torso is that of a female raptor...lol just kidding, you seem like a nice gal and i would like to know you better.

[JOS]

Do you know this is a support group.... NOT a place for your titillation!

If you want that, there are plenty of places you can go.
This is NOT that type of site!

[EZsquirt]

Honey, don't bastardize me because I have a sense of humor. FYI I am diagnosed as a pseudohermaphrodie, and I came here looking for support, but apparenly I am not welcome. Sorry I infringed on this exclusive site.

[miriam]

Honey, don't bastardize me because I have a sense of humor. FYI I am diagnosed as a pseudohermaphrodie, and I came here looking for support, but apparenly I am not welcome. Sorry I infringed on this exclusive site.

If you are looking for support you better stop calling people here "honey" and "babe" because you bastardize yourself that way. How about telling us a bit more about yourself and your diagnosis? Nobody can support you if nobody knows what kind of support you need.

Miriam

[EZsquirt]

Its those kind of things that you need to learn not to effect you, theres nothing offensive about someone trying to be friendly. If someone called me a "freak" daily but i knew they were doing it for the sake of humor or friendship, then I would have no problem with it. Theres no reason for something like that to get you down.

[fraulein_Maria]

[QUOTE=EZsquirt;15095]Honey, don't bastardize me because I have a sense of humor. FYI I am diagnosed as a pseudohermaphrodie

>>> Look BUSTER, both miriam and i actually are psuedohermaphrodites....

she an AIS'er.... a completely female and feminine looking woman.... with XY chromosomes... once upon a time called (sadly) a male psuedo-hermaphrodite.

i, OTOH, have CAH... which masculinizes this XX'er.... and once upon a time called a female psuedo-hermaphrodite.

If you have neither condition, your not what you claim to be. The very term psuedo-hermaphrodite has fallen into disuse by the medical profession... they haven't used it to describe us in nearly 20 years.... so i don't think any doctor told you anything....

i think your an XY male who read an old book and came here for kicks.

Get lost.

[EZsquirt]

I wasn't even diagnosed until I was 19. I may have something wrong with me but I don't let the little things get me down. I'm not going to over exert myself to be part of a forum with a bunch of stuck up vaginas. I bid you farewell.

[miriam]

Don't feed the troll
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_(Internet)

[EZsquirt]

Alright, I'll admit that I am "Trolling", I am not a pseudohermaphrodite but i still stand by my previous statement.

"Its those kind of things that you need to learn not to effect you, theres nothing offensive about someone trying to be friendly. If someone called me a "freak" daily but i knew they were doing it for the sake of humor or friendship, then I would have no problem with it. Theres no reason for something like that to get you down."

[PAISWoman]

:sign16:

[fraulein_Maria]

[QUOTE=miriam;15104]Don't feed the troll
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Troll_(Internet)

>>> LOL :) i posted a pic of one of those once, didn't i? ;)

[JOS]

:wave1:

[Kailana]

Ezsqirt, I would hope you came to learn, cause otherwise you won't be hear long at all. This forum is meant for people who care, who have issues, need answers, people who don't need a sarcastic wise ass, if you can't understand that then just do us all a favor and find another place to make innappropriate comments.

[Anis789]

Do you know this is a support group.... NOT a place for your titillation!

If you want that, there are plenty of places you can go.
This is NOT that type of site!

Hi JOS

I googled intersex support and your post came up and that is how I learnt of 'bodies like ours',

At 15 I was told I have PAIS so I've visit the suppprt group for AIS and learnt a great deal. I don't know what intersex condtion I have because I am also visually impaired and have 3 brothers with other condtion so the medical folk have sed I am 1 of a kind! I have the option to have male hormones but don't want to get hairy and it no longer bothers me that people put the phone down on me thinking I amnot the acount holder just because I am a MR but sound like a woman. Besides if I have some insenitivity to androgens whats to say that hormones will work - I don't want to change who I am - do hormones cahnge our behaviour I think they may do so?

Thanks again

Take care x :D

[fraulein_Maria]

[QUOTE=Anis789;15188]Hi JOS

I googled intersex support and your post came up and that is how I learnt of 'bodies like ours

>>> hey JOS, your famous! :) <<<

At 15 I was told I have PAIS so I've visit the suppprt group for AIS and learnt a great deal. I don't know what intersex condtion I have

>>> Anis, AIS even when its "only" partial is an intersexed condition. Completes are always raised as girls, and i'm beginning to think its cruel that they even try to raise partials as boys when i see how much pain they must endure. <<<

the medical folk have sed I am 1 of a kind!

>>> yeah but they were wrong. :) though more rare than complete AIS, there are still a bunch of you out there. <<<

I have the option to have male hormones but don't want to

>>> i'm glad for your sake its "optional". getting to choose our treatment after ALL our options are thoroughly laid out (that usually means seeing many doctors) makes all the difference. <<<

Besides if I have some insenitivity to androgens whats to say that hormones will work

>>> a logical question, not asked enough. because sometimes it does, and sometimes it doesn't. the doctors don't really know, they are experimenting.<<<

- I don't want to change who I am - do hormones cahnge our behaviour I think they may do so?

>>> what they can change is how you feel. sometimes what you feel. and occasionally, what you think. but your behavior is something you can control. and who you are.... is the decisions you make.

before prednisone (cortisol replacement that prevents excess androgens) I spent most of my waking hours angry/hungry/and horney and occasionally those feelings got blurred. I got no relief in my sleep as these invaded my dreamlife aswell.

but even without prednisone, i CHOSE to dismiss these feelings as unworthy of any action other than surpression most of the time...

If i had eaten every time i thought i was hungry, I would never have stopped eating, and weigh far more than i do now. I DECIDED to not BE gluttonous, even though i felt that way.

the same is true for the anger and drive.

But that is excess. with prednisone, i have a "normal" amount. that normal amount is responsible for sexual desire... which is nice when i'm in control of it. Like flying :)

I'm happy with a "normal" amount of it. if i had less than a normal amount, i'd probably be depressed. many who have lower than a normal amount do become depressed. some who have always had a low amount do not realize they are/have been depressed.... because its always been that way.

Whatever you do though, please be careful. taking large amounts of hormones can wreck havoc in anyones body, even the "insensate". the liver can only process so much of it, and over-working it can be a really bad thing.

[Kailana]

yes Anis, they can change how you think, your moods too, sort of depends what your taking and how much. Also depends on the person, some people react badly to HRT of anykind.

If your ok without any then don't bother with them, although, you might want to check out your bone health, bone density testing. That might be of interest to you more then hormones themselves. Some HRT could be beneficial to you if you are having issues with your bone health. Early bone decay, osteoporosis, osteoarthritus can happen with a hornmone imbalance. That might be of your highest concern. Ask a doctor, your doctors might have some helpfull advice, like taking calcium suppliments that might work too instead of using HRT.

[Anis789]

yeah my bone dencity is low should be taking vitiman D calcuim daily but forget at times. I think its down to peoor diet really. Maria and Kailana thanks I wiil go on Auguts 15 and tell that docotor I sure I aint PAIS?! too short to be he said, well maybe doctors don't know more than us whom live with intersex condtions.

Awwwwwwwwwww You all warm my heart its so lovely to have a place to share and learn of interseuality - am I okay to call it that?

[fraulein_Maria]

[QUOTE=Anis789;15228]yeah my bone dencity is low should be taking vitiman D calcuim daily but forget at times. I think its down to peoor diet really.

>>> and you must exercise. if you have a sit-down job, please spend half of your lunch hour WALKING. <<<

Maria and Kailana thanks I wiil go on Auguts 15 and tell that docotor I sure I aint PAIS?! too short to be he said, well maybe doctors don't know more than us whom live with intersex condtions.

>>> you've hit the nail on the head. :) <<<

Awwwwwwwwwww You all warm my heart its so lovely to have a place to share and learn of interseuality - am I okay to call it that?

>>> yes it is. but better perhaps to say "intersexual-ism". "-ality" makes it sound like a lifestyle choice. <<<<