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What are the signs that you're being paranoid as opposed to being intuative.
I often get told that I am just being paranoid.... but quite often my predictions come true... so how can one tell when you're not thinking rationally? :happy45:
fraulein_Maria
09-10-08, 11:09 PM
[QUOTE=JOS;16427]What are the signs that you're being paranoid as opposed to being intuative.
I often get told that I am just being paranoid.... but quite often my predictions come true... so how can one tell when you're not thinking rationally?
>>> I have to say you have never struck me as paranoid... and i work with paranoid clients... had a paranoid girl friend (Joyce).
there is a world of difference between being appropriately cautious and paranoid. Most people who would accuse YOU, JOS, of having crossed over have simply not had to lead your life.
In regards to ANYTHING remotely associated with gender and sex....
those whose gender/sex is never questioned, JUST DON'T GET IT.
I still have to explain to my landlady that there are people out there who would SHOOT ME: if they both knew about me, and thought they could get away with it.
So kissing my girl-friend in public outside of New England, or cities elsewhere is as much asking for trouble as wearing diamonds on a subway car.
Paranoid is when you avoid kissing in private because the neighbors MIGHT be looking in your window (they might, but that old biddy doesn't have a gun) Paranoid is not wearing costume jewelry on a subway car.
Those are practical examples... as a general principle, remember this...
If your level of caution keeps you safe AND enables you to lead your life free of fear AND neither unduly limits your choices, nor the choices of those around you...You are quite rational.
unless your dead broke, buying a lock for the door and giving your loved ones keys is appropriate.
buying several locks and using them indoors is paranoid.
I would tell you my opinion but I'm afraid that people might be listening...maybe they're outside my window...watching me right now...maybe they're behind me watching my every move...
...oh wait, it's just my dogs. LOL. :wink_smil
Ummm.. I've never had that feeling but after my visit to London I definitely feel someone is watching me. :o
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prince....ss?
09-11-08, 09:06 AM
Your too funny EMW. You have my strange and warped sense of humor. We need to hang and hang and have a few beers.
I'm impressed you managed to sneak HIM through passport control :rolleye11
Kailana
09-11-08, 06:10 PM
What are the signs that you're being paranoid as opposed to being intuative.
I often get told that I am just being paranoid.... but quite often my predictions come true... so how can one tell when you're not thinking rationally? :happy45:
First of all rational thought is subjective to the person affected by the thoughts, or by the person listening to whats being discussed or the behaviour being diagnosed.
To make things simple, if a person is thinking rationally there won't be any interference in there lives by their thoughts. But if a person isn't thinking rationally, everyone else will notice the behavior/behavior's of that person as sticking out oddly. Oh and another thing, if you are talking about prediction's coming true, then thats not paranoia, thats clairvoyance, forseeing the future has nothing to do with being paranoid, but usually means the person is very intuitive reading signs others miss, because they are looking for them.
If it helps, i am sure many of the doctors, phychiatrists and therapists i have scene over the years would describe my belief "that doctors are purposely withholding medical information from me and other doctor's that would make it much easier for healthcare professionals to understand me better, because they believe they are doing the right thing by denying access to very important medical records", as a paranoid belief, but so far at least not a single one of them has been that cruel to label me with a paranoid Dx, then again i have had a delusional Dx, but at least with that it's been refuted in a court of law, and stated that:there is no delusion with this client, as there is a underlying genetic disorder responsible for the gender identity, bone anomalies(developmental bone alterations;deterioration) and multi-body system that many ..... irrelevant data, so I won't bore anyone with it.
Just because someone thinks a behavior may fit with a paranoid dx, doesn't make it paranoid behavior, as our thoughts do not make our actions, but our thoughts do make for interesting subjects to discuss. I suppose i could say to make things simple :if your debating with yourself that a thought is paranoidish in nature, probably means, your actually thinking rationally and are just contemplating a rational solution to a situation or problem.
ever thought... she's acting a bit weird today
then later... he's also acting strangely
then when you've thought a whole bunch of people seem to be treating you differently that day it dawns on you:
IT'S NOT THEM THAT'S WEIRD!!
one time i actually constructed this whole senario whereby i was convinced three different people didn't like me anymore (because i'm a freak)... i decided i had to ask them what i'd done and each of them had three completely separate things wrong that day... so i wasn't (strictly speaking) being paranoid.... just completely egocentric.... "they're acting differently towards me today therefore i must have upset them because it's all about ME ME ME" LOL!
Yeah ok, i'm even irritating myself now... somebody slap me please :brick:
fraulein_Maria
09-11-08, 09:44 PM
just completely egocentric.... "they're acting differently towards me today therefore i must have upset them because it's all about ME ME ME" LOL!
Yeah ok, i'm even irritating myself now... somebody slap me please :brick:
>>> no violence please! i wish that instead of a brick it was a chocolate cream pie!!!
which of course i'd eat, not throw!! ;)
Psssst! shhhhhh! Everyone can see that ENORMOUS bulge in your pants.....
i think you need to hide your cigarettes someplace else!
I actually shoved a pack in there once just to see if anyones eyes would drift down....
And of course... the guys were too busy looking at my tits to notice...
but the girls....
lets just say i never repeated that gag! ;)
slightly different question then:
what are the signs that someone is not being completely honest?
I think that maybe I'm just really gullible or naive... it's true that I often WANT to see the good in people but that shouldn't stop you from a bit of self preservation should it?
I can remember my mum once made a comment along the lines of
" I know more about you than you know about yourself "
with hindsight, I can see that she was right!!... or maybe she was just making one of those Mum comments LOL?
I hear you, JOS. I know what you are talking about. And yet I don't have an anwer to your question.
Groeten,Miriam
fraulein_Maria
09-12-08, 06:23 PM
[QUOTE=JOS;16491]slightly different question then:
what are the signs that someone is not being completely honest?
>>> when they are telling you EXACTLY what you want to hear. But its usually only abusive parteners that pull that....
so i guess it would depend on whom you meant.
Complete honesty is a rare thing.....and not always a good thing. In New England, people are too polite to mention that my hair looks like a rats nest if i forget to use some grease to tame it... a NY'er would snicker... down south, it can get you shot in the wrong neighborhood.
a friend will gently ask me if i would like to borrow a comb ;)
a parent will say "your not leaving the house looking like that"
none of the above have been completely honest, some to spare my feelings, the others to ridicule...
and so Diogenes, keep searching. the one completely honest person on the planet was crucified, and anyone else who tries to be usually winds up in the same predicament... an object lesson.
accept the pretty white lies from those that love you... and only ask them for the whole truth when someones life depends on it... even then, you have to let them know that neither you nor anyone else will punish them for it.
the rest? self-interest of a more financial sort will prevail.
I'm an ex. cop i assume that everyone lies. Often the lies people tell are interesting because they usually tell me more about the person speaking them, than they do about the person there refering to. to clarify...
the aweful lies person (A) tells about person (B) are a projection.
So when someone calls me an idiot.... i'm pretty certain the poor dear thinks themselves stupid.... i'm just way too off the scale to believe such nonsense.
the pretty lies (A) tells about (B) are there hopes and dreams. <<<
I think that maybe I'm just really gullible or naive... it's true that I often WANT to see the good in people but that shouldn't stop you from a bit of self preservation should it?
>>> no, it shouldn't. There are only 3 classes of people who know i'm intersexed... intersexed friends... friends who might become lovers, and as many medical professionals as i can speak to.... i feel its my duty to educate them so they don't treat the next IS person like shite. Of my immediate family, only my daughter knows. The others will not know until genetic testing confirms everything. I'm in the process of doing just that. <<<
I can remember my mum once made a comment along the lines of
" I know more about you than you know about yourself "
with hindsight, I can see that she was right!!... or maybe she was just making one of those Mum comments LOL?
>>> no, i don't think she was. others that love us (not others that don't) ALWAYS know more about us
than we do ourselves... our blind spots preserve our sanity... because we can't face all that we are... all at once. We judge ourselves mercilessly until we learn not to.....
and THEN we become self-aware... but even then, we still need the spots on our backs pointed out to us. <<<
prince....ss?
09-12-08, 09:26 PM
slightly different question then:
what are the signs that someone is not being completely honest?
Ok I have the answer to that one. First I will say that I have had a crappy day and once again it's because of honesty. So I'm feeling a bit low this evening.
I know for a fact that with this customer of mine that he is not completely honest when his lips are moving or when he sends me emails.
Ok now for my man bashing answer but still true. The big sign that someone is not being completely honest if if he is a man!
Time to find a beer and cry in it for a while.
melonade
09-13-08, 05:50 PM
What are the signs that you're being paranoid as opposed to being intuative.
I often get told that I am just being paranoid.... but quite often my predictions come true... so how can one tell when you're not thinking rationally? :happy45:
I would think that you are only just being paranoid when your intuition was wrong. But that isn't very helpful, because you can't use it to decide if you are being paranoid until you've already found out the truth.
The Female Eunuch
09-13-08, 06:00 PM
Melonade wrote: I would think that you are only just being paranoid when your intuition was wrong. But that isn't very helpful, because you can't use it to decide if you are being paranoid until you've already found out the truth.
In recent years, I've often noticed that I ignore my intuition, thinking it must be wrong, and later found it was correct. so I figure that my intuition is getting more reliable, and that maybe I should start taking more notice of it.
cheers,
caroline
So next we simply have to define truth!
.... and invent a time machine :idea2:
melonade
09-14-08, 04:05 PM
So next we simply have to define truth!
.... and invent a time machine :idea2:
Having dark intuitions too, it hasn't been impossibly hard to compromise between the parallax views of intuitions being right and being wrong. It's acceptable to act on intuition up to the point of where in an intuition-wrong case my actions would start having negative consequences. There is usually a pool of options common to both.
so trust yourself up to the point where you can no longer trust yourself LOL:lol:
sorry... I do get your point... it hinges on the hope that you will know when you are beginning to cross a line... but what kind of negative consequences do you include, minor impingement's on your own life or breaking laws kinda consequences
in my case I think I've been living my life somewhat frozen in fear... not knowing whether to trust myself or to trust others around me... and, therefore, not ACTING at all!!
And Caroline, I too...
[..often noticed that I ignore my intuition, thinking it must be wrong, and later found it was correct.]
but I keep making the same mistake again and again... I've even had the scenario where someone has WANTED to follow my plan but I've persuaded them not to... and then it was correct .... doh:doh:
guess for me I'm currently more comfortable living with the 'consequences' of being right but not acting than with those of acting and being wrong.... classic egotist!!
fraulein_Maria
09-14-08, 08:10 PM
[QUOTE=JOS;16589]
in my case I think I've been living my life somewhat frozen in fear...
>>> i'm sooo sorry. <<<
not knowing whether to trust myself or to trust others around me... and, therefore, not ACTING at all!!
>>> oh my! I've been more of a "damned if i do, damned if i don't" gal, so i might aswell do what i think best..... the consequences are seldom as bad as i fear..... it helps to pray a great deal before i act, if i have time to.
Even my landlady of no faith... sees the value of "thinking out loud to the universe" <<<
guess for me I'm currently more comfortable living with the 'consequences' of being right but not acting than with those of acting and being wrong.... classic egotist!!
>>> your no worse than anyone who bets horses in there heads... they win everytime ;)
occassionally, one must put there money where there mouth is.....
gambling in life and horses is the same art....
you do your homework: then 5 minutes to post time, you review the horses/decision... then make your best bet.
i've seen many a person second guess themselves into a loss....
which is why when Sue and i go to the track.... i bet her FIRST CHOICE ;)
mostly though, i gamble with my heart...
i find that currency easier to replace ;)
especially when i consider the only loss... not playing :)
mostly though, i gamble with my heart...
i find that currency easier to replace
especially when i consider the only loss... not playing
I suppose that sometimes you have to take a risk.
I thought I was being pretty... risky... asking people if I've mis-construed their behaviour but actually, when you put it that way, it's probably more detrimental not to ask.
fraulein_Maria
10-16-08, 09:32 PM
[QUOTE=JOS;18553]I suppose that sometimes you have to take a risk.
I thought I was being pretty... risky... asking people if I've mis-construed their behaviour but actually, when you put it that way, it's probably more detrimental not to ask.
>>>>>>> Cost/Benefit
What do i lose?/ what can i gain?/ what is gained regardless?
the words: "I'm sorry."
A little false pride/ a renewed relationship/ integrity is restored
the same is true for just about any method you use to begin that particular conversation.
as the Bard hath said, "This above all: to thine own self, be true...
and it must follow, as the night the day, thou can'st not then be false to any man" <<
prince....ss?
10-16-08, 10:27 PM
Well this is not really paranoia but it is how I see things.
Expect the worst...hope for the best.
I know this is very cynical but it helps to see people for what they are. It also helps from being disappointed when someone lets you down.
This works for me when I just start to know someone but does fall short when a long time friend and trusted person lets you down.
But this really helps you out in business because you always have planed for the worst and if it does not happen then you are that much ahead on things.
This is my 16d's worth
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