Soul searching

[Twister]

Hi
I new here of course and wanting to learn more about my condition. I'm not sure what is wrong with me but I am tired of testosterone treatment. I figure there is no better way to learn than reading what others are going through. I just found this site and please to meet other posters.

[spacegirl]

Hello, I'm almost as new as you.
It sounds like you could maybe swap testosterone stories with Aseras, of course. Do you happen to have 47xxy or anything like that?

I've had my own share of androgens, but it wasn't something I was taking. And it also didn't effect me as much as it does some people.

[Laura Robison]

Welcome, Twister.

Tell us a little more about yourself. How long have you been given testosterone? Did the doctors tell you anything at all about a possible diagnosis? I find it amazing that doctors would give someone testosterone without knowing what they were giving it for.

[kristan]

HI.

I had been given testosterone treatments until puberty started, I believe these may have been stopped so that I did not learn of my condition. I did not learn of my condition until I was 37, and in retrospect my chaotic puberty period of my life makes sense now. I just began an estrogen and antiandrogen HRT regimen and am responding with results way beyond what a MTF transsexual would.

I am new to this site as well and everyone appears to be very helpful and knowledgeable.

Good Luck,

Kristan

[spacegirl]

Interesting Kristan. What condition did they eventually tell you you'd had all those years? How did they disquise the testosterone so you didn't know you were taking it.?

[kristan]

My mother has confirmed for me that I'm intersexed, but will NOT go into more detail for me. So many things now make sense to me......like the daily ritual when I was young of a smooshed up pill in applesauce. I'm on ssdi and need to wait until July 2010 to get medicaid before I can see a doctor. Oh, how I'm counting the days!

[spacegirl]

There are pill encyclopedias with pictures of what all the known pills look like. If you remember what the pills looked like, you might be able to identify them. I thought that testosterone is either served up as an injection or a gel?

It's not a sure thing that every mystery pill from childhood is testosterone. The mystery pills I got as a child were listed in a pill encyclopedia as a "hypnotic". But why they would try to hypnotize me is a bigger mystery.

[Aseras]

Hi
I new here of course and wanting to learn more about my condition. I'm not sure what is wrong with me but I am tired of testosterone treatment. I figure there is no better way to learn than reading what others are going through. I just found this site and please to meet other posters.

Hi and welcome. What particular condition do you think you have? We all know inside what works for us, sometimes it takes some trial and error to find it. Nothing like feeling like a million bucks or a well oiled machine when you get it right.

[Aseras]

Sounds like my mom. Every now and then a little bit more sneaks out. I still have some suspicion that there are still things hidden from me.

My mother has confirmed for me that I'm intersexed, but will NOT go into more detail for me. So many things now make sense to me......like the daily ritual when I was young of a smooshed up pill in applesauce. I'm on ssdi and need to wait until July 2010 to get medicaid before I can see a doctor. Oh, how I'm counting the days!

[Dianne]

Sounds like my mom. Every now and then a little bit more sneaks out. I still have some suspicion that there are still things hidden from me.

LOL! My adopted mother would never let anything slip, not even when I was on death's doorstep! On the other hand, my birth mother, who hadn't got the lectures on Money's theories, was very open.

[spacegirl]

LOL! My adopted mother would never let anything slip, not even when I was on death's doorstep! On the other hand, my birth mother, who hadn't got the lectures on Money's theories, was very open.

An interesting comment. I wonder if more intersexed children end up being adopted (legally or otherwise) than the proportion of normal children?

It's good that you've met your birth mother. I didn't find out who my mother was until it was too late.

My uncle didn't say a word about me being "adopted" until he was on his deathbed, and my aunt still won't tell the truth even when confronted with pretty solid evidence.

[kristan]

Clearly I could be wrong about the pills.

posted by spacegirl
It's not a sure thing that every mystery pill from childhood is testosterone. The mystery pills I got as a child were listed in a pill encyclopedia as a "hypnotic". But why they would try to hypnotize me is a bigger mystery.

It was a deduction on my part, but I am the first to admit I don't know all the facts yet.

I'm not sure what to say about the hypnotic given to you spacegirl, that is an odd one.

Peace,

[spacegirl]

Clearly I could be wrong about the pills.

It was a deduction on my part, but I am the first to admit I don't know all the facts yet.
I'm not sure what to say about the hypnotic given to you spacegirl, that is an odd one.
Peace,

Did you notice any pre-pubertal androgen effects to go along with the pills?

There is a pre-pubertal event called "adrenarche" when the adrenal become more active in preparation for puberty. If you happened to have some form of cah, that might turn into extra androgens and been coincidental to the pills.

Mystery pills were only one of many odd things in my childhood. Even intersex doesn't come close to explaining the weirdness of things done/said about me.

I did check what a hypnotic is supposed to be, it's a type of sleep inducer. But I've never had insomnia. The pills were also given in the morning before school, and I definitely wasn't hyperactive without them. That might be the reason why several years of going-to/being-in school are missing from my memories.

[kristan]

Did you notice any pre-pubertal androgen effects to go along with the pills?

There is a pre-pubertal event called "adrenarche" when the adrenal become more active in preparation for puberty. If you happened to have some form of cah, that might turn into extra androgens and been coincidental to the pills.



I'm going to add CAH to the list of 3 billion things I need to ask a Doctor when I get there. Puberty was a very strange time for me. I remember being teased for larger than normal breasts for a boy, and I do not have any recollection of my voice 'cracking'. A razor did not touch my face until I was almost 19.

If CAH was present, I was and am still unaware of it.

It's a shame you cannot remember much of school, and it seems as tho life has not been the easiest for you.

Smooches,

[Dianne]

An interesting comment. I wonder if more intersexed children end up being adopted (legally or otherwise) than the proportion of normal children?

My birth mother was 20 and unmarried when I was born so she didn't have much choice. It was such a traumatic time for her and I was her first child so she isn't even aware of the ramifications of some of the things she told me just in passing.