Things don't add up....

[Luminous Butterfly]

Hello everybody,

I'm not entirely sure if I am in the right place, so please bear with me. Some quite explicit details of my personal life and sexual identity follow, so please do not read on if you feel you may be offended, and my full apologies if you inadvertantly were.

I was raised and identify as female. I have been menstruating normally since my early teens. However, over the last three years (I'm now 21) there has been an increasing gap between my periods, so now there is 8-10 weeks between each cycle.

I noticed that my clitoral hood is roughly one inch or so long, and my labia majora is correspondingly larger. It sort of 'grew' during puberty. It can move independently of my puffy lab maj.

Part of my concern over an undisclosed medical condition is based on gut instinct, and partly on the response of my first sexual partner: 'um, I think you're a hermaphrodite'. His words, not mines.

I have of course attempted to have a GP examine me on several occassions, none of whom would. I now face lengthy waiting lists in all directions, and so was lookin for a bit of wisdom and advice, if any of you have made it this far in this truly monumental first post.

[Luminous Butterfly]

Sorry, forgot to add that I was bullied for having a very low deep voice when I was twelve, thirteen - I forced it higher out of its natural register to avoid the negative attention, his might factor into pubertal changes that are somewhat atypical.

[Peter]

Part of my concern over an undisclosed medical condition is based on gut instinct, and partly on the response of my first sexual partner: 'um, I think you're a hermaphrodite'. His words, not mines.


Hi Luminous Butterfly;

I think that you are possibly onto something here. I know that at birth, one of the first phrases that is often heard is "It's a girl.", or "It's a boy."
I was born with ambiguous genitals, and although the sex of my dead twin was noted as male, the fragments of my medical chart that I have gotten, have me without a sex marker. My mother told me that I was born with a vaginal cleft but lacked internal female organs. I am always interested in first hand reports that a person has been socially labeled intersex by other people. As your partner said "um, I think you're a hermaphrodite", I think that you are onto something significant. I often heard similar words from girlfriends when I was younger, and that was after infant genital surgery, when my genitals were surgically normalized, except for pronounced folded lips of the perineum. Intersex sounds like a topic that is naturally of concern to you. Good luck on finding a doctor who can help you answer your questions.

Peter

[Aseras]

What does your gyno think?

[Luminous Butterfly]

Hi Peter, thank you for your personal response. I know the gender binary is somewhat an obstacle to individual intersex identity. Both of my parents are aware of the existance of intersex conditions (a little odd for small town Catholics) but they have never linked that knowledge to my circumstances.

I hadn't realised there was anything wrong before that comment was made, but now mentally if not medically I identify as intersex. I feel that's more as a result of coming to my own conclusion as opposed to imbibing the opinions of another individual.
Again, thank you for your response. I would be happy to discuss my experience with you further, even if it is not as a 'medical' condition.

Hi Aseras, thank you for your response. I was referred to our local sexual health clinic as my GP said they'd reassure me that everything is ok (as I can't have penetrative sex, my vaginal canal has narrowed too much over the last three years). I had said to my GP I'm not sure if my problems are structural, psychological or a combination of both. I've not been able to get a physical exam, and both my GP and the vlinic have offered me to be on waiting lists for gyno. I just don't want to wait all that time because 1) I'm probably the most impatient person I know and 2) I don't want to wait all that time to find out that gyno doesn't apply to me. I'm back in that small town temporarily so I don't really feel like humilliating myself infront of medical professionals who might not be familiar with intersex conditions and experience.

[Aseras]

oh being intersex is all about humiliating yourself for the doctors, really. I swear they like it... every time I go even if I've seen them a dozen times they insist on examining me naked. I almost always get a breast exam too, sometimes twice one by a resident and another by the attending. it's messed up.

I'd say a gyno is you best bet. They have seen everything, they generally are the ones who see intersex patients the most, from delivery to exams. gynecologist study the reproductive system more than any other doctor in most practices outside of some over specialized doctors ( that you wont find ). They can tell you if something is up or not. pray there isn't.

[tommsg]

Is there any possiblilty that you had a vaginoplasty or vaginal surgery as a child/infant other? The fact that your vagina is growing together is what raises this question for us. The longer times between periods may be due to the anxiety we detect in your questions.

It's also worth noting that the range of variation in genitals is quite large. We've talked to many women with tipped vaginas that could only be entered from the rear, or required extra gymnastics to engage. We've also noted how vaginas grow tighter if not exercised.

Please do go to a GOOD Gyn - ask around - you need to get this cleared up so you can stop worrying.

[Luminous Butterfly]

Hi Tom/Ms G I'm pretty confident that I've managed to avoid infant surgery. I have no scarring at all and generous levels of sensation, overly generous at times, becoming incredibly uncomfortable.
My GP, although they didn't give me a pelvic exam, suspected vaginismus. There are alot of structures inside that sem a little out of place though. I hadn't heard of a tipped uterus. I am clearly not here for a diagnosis but it is something i will make sure my GP definately checks for.
The obvious conclusion is to book a doctor's appointment asap, and get an answer, or at least progress towards one. Hopefully it'll be third time lucky and I'll be able to get an exam from my GP. I'm being batted about between gyno at the hospital and gyno and the clinic so hopefully I'll make it clear an exam is vital.

[galens47]

Intersex sounds like a topic that is naturally of concern to you. Good luck on finding a doctor who can help you answer your questions.

Peter

Hello Luminous Butterfly,

Welcome. I will work on a doc that will be starting closer to you in understanding, it will take time. If any have suggestions on here please help.

Thanks,

Galens47

[galens47]

oh being intersex is all about humiliating yourself for the doctors, really. I swear they like it... every time I go even if I've seen them a dozen times they insist on examining me naked. I almost always get a breast exam too, sometimes twice one by a resident and another by the attending. it's messed up.

I'd say a gyno is you best bet. They have seen everything, they generally are the ones who see intersex patients the most, from delivery to exams. gynecologist study the reproductive system more than any other doctor in most practices outside of some over specialized doctors ( that you wont find ). They can tell you if something is up or not. pray there isn't.

Hi Aseras,

May I forward this to an OB/GYN faculty collegue of mine?

Thanks,

Galen

[galens47]

Is there any possiblilty that you had a vaginoplasty or vaginal surgery as a child/infant other? The fact that your vagina is growing together is what raises this question for us. The longer times between periods may be due to the anxiety we detect in your questions.

It's also worth noting that the range of variation in genitals is quite large. We've talked to many women with tipped vaginas that could only be entered from the rear, or required extra gymnastics to engage. We've also noted how vaginas grow tighter if not exercised.

Please do go to a GOOD Gyn - ask around - you need to get this cleared up so you can stop worrying.

Greetings,

We can recommend a good OB/GYN, this is easy. Where are you?

Cheers,

Galen/Juniper

[Aseras]

Sure. You can share anything posted in the main forum. It is public after all. If I don't want something shared, I'll send a PM and I'll tell you so.

[galens47]

This group is coming around.

The OB/GYN section is very good

http://www.ucdmc.ucdavis.edu/famcommed/

Cheers,

Galen

[fraulein_Maria]

[QUOTE=Luminous Butterfly;23443]Hello everybody,

>>> first welcome :) <<<<



Part of my concern over an undisclosed medical condition is based on gut instinct, and partly on the response of my first sexual partner: 'um, I think you're a hermaphrodite'. His words, not mines.

>>> i'm sorry that he was such an asshole. Based on your description, i can safely say that you might have some extra T in you, but not more than is part of normal femaleness. Adrenarche happens to all normal girls, some just more than others.

"hermaphrodite" is a word like "Dyke".....

it doesn't decribe the woman its attributed to, only the man who says it.

[Default]

Hi Luminous Butterfly,

My personal opinion is that there are many conditions other than intersex that can cause your medical concerns. I would feel that intersex would be the least likely if not impossible cause. I am assuming that you would have told us that you are on medication and have been for a long time if you were.

Therefore, if you have been having periods (you must have a uterus and by default ovary/ovaries). If this is the case then you are almost definitely XX (female). I say almost definitely because medicine is a work in progress. You most likely have (top 3) either a stricture (a narrow band that can form in any opening), a divided vagina (and or uterus), or possibly have a version of sex anxiety which can involuntarily clamp down the vaginal muscles so tight as not to be able to have penetration (this being the most common cause that I have seen).

In either case the best bet would be a (and I use this word loosly) GOOD GYN. If the GYN you go to dismisses you and does not answer your questions, then go to another. Please research the doctor before you go, finding one who is rated well is in your best interest.

I hope this helps. I must add, that even though I am a Doctor, I am not in anyway giving medical advise here that is meant to substitue your visit to a doctor in person!