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View Full Version : XXY/Intersex as it could apply to Same-Sex marriage and Domestic Partnership law


DCmerlin
06-08-06, 06:55 AM
Granted the Federal Marriage Amendment didn't pass this time, but this is not the first time it was voted on and it probably won't be the last. A lot of people including myself are very disturbed by how close it came to even 50% of the vote. You don't need to tell me that Conservatives just don't want people to enjoy themselves. In the end conservatives just have to grow up, which of course they won't because if could they would not be conservative.

Today I was reading that among those debating whether or not homosexuality can be cured, there's an interesting question, "Is Homosexuality Genetic". Personally I'm not homosexual but given what I've witnessed, I believe it certainly IS genetic. Unfortunately I doubt that will be proven in our lifetimes, which brings me to my current thought.

It comes down to law and precedent and my realization for today is that citizens bearing hermaphroditic conditions as well as less obvious variations of the sex chromosomes may produce the necessary precedent!

Among those on this web site, especially those who are a bit closer to the "middle" of the gender spectrum, a major issue is of course being forced by society to select a gender to identify with. Many of us would prefer not to do this. What if *WE* were to push this issue to the Supreme Court, claiming that our rights are being violated not by some subjective "choice" to BE homosexual but by an arguably "incurable" mixed set of sex chromosomes!

The way I see it, the very restrictive laws in force in many states are making it nearly impossible for us to be married or partnered to EITHER gender. Is an intersexed woman who likes other women necessarily a man? Is an intersexed man with a micro-penis, kind of a woman? What if sie does not wish to decide?

What if we were to use OUR unique genetics and sometimes unusual or unanticipated gender identity, to allow us to push open a legal door which might allow us to decide which gender(s) is right for us regardless of our outward appearance? What if XXY (and similar conditions) were to make us the first citizens of this country to be legally recognized as Dual-Sexual?

[for the remainder of this document I will be using my condition of XXY as a blanket definition simply because it is easier for me.]

Examples:
1) Suppose two XXY's marry... are they marrying their own Gender?
2) If one XXY marries an XX and the other XXY marries an XY, which one is the same sex couple?
3) Two XXY's walk into a bar...

My point is that XXY's may make the PERFECT test case for the gay marriage debate. Intersex, grays across into Trans-sex and finally into gender preference. If one XXY male likes females and another XXY male likes other males, who is to say than an XY male can't also like other males?

Once it is decided that XXY's are exempt from laws barring same sex marriage, that should open some doors.

Now what about Transsexuals. If an M2F transsexual marries a male, that by definition is not actually a same sex marriage because transsexuals are legally protected as identifying as their destination gender. Now what about pre op transsexuals, or No OP transsexuals?? What makes this question interesting is that strictly stated conservatives purport that marriage is for children, and they don't feel that couples that cannot produce children should be married. Transsexuals, unless they started in a hermaphroditic condition generally cannot reproduce at all. Conservatives also do not want orphans to be adopted into "unnatural" circumstances, such as a same sex marriage. But isn't transsexuality itself an unnatural circumstance?

An aside. I've spoken to many guys who feel they never "fit in" as guys who gave that among their reasons to wish to seek a sex change, among these one was just like me, a reasonably healthy, somewhat odd-looking straight male with fully functioning male genitalia and bizarre sex chromosomes. The difference, I think, is that I've managed to find a large number of people who accept and appreciate me. It doesn't bother me that I don't fit in with mainstream folk. In such an instance a sex change seems extreme to my point of view but even with our similarities, I can't get inside his head. I can't relate to wanting the have another gender to the degree of willing to undergo surgery to do so.

Meadow
06-08-06, 07:48 PM
DCmerlin,

Yes, you make a compelling argument in what you have stated. At the end of the day, yours is another good reason that chips away at a very narrow, and somewhat antiquated, view on relationships.

Its interesting and appreciated that you include the plight of transsexuals, many who may not have the finances to complete a "legal" change of sex through expensive surgery. But also, is it not bizarre that someone can legally marry only someone of one sex in the morning, undergo surgery during the day, and then only be able to legally marry someone of a different sex that afternoon? And really, except for some plumbing changes, how is that person truly different?

I am glad that you may be willing to join the fight. Me? I'm simply getting tired and I'm planning on just laying down my sword.

All the Best . . . . Meadow

jenny
06-12-06, 10:06 PM
I've been thinking a lot about this lately. Check out this article. http://www.washingtontimes.com/upi-breaking/20041117-092204-4819r.htm
I am an XY female, and I am married to an XY male. So in Texas, my marriage would be illegal. However, according to the law, it would be ok for me to marry an XX woman! I have Complete AIS, so I am very female in appearance...can you see them try to squeeze that into their brains? So my marriage to a woman would not be same sex marriage, but my marriage to a man would be same sex marriage. It's all so crazy. Most of my family would probably vote for a ban on gay marriage...it's like there is a disconnect in their head somewhere. They totally love me and accept me...but do they really ever stop and think about 'what' I am?...and if they did would they find it a little harder to love me. I think people prefer not to have to think about such things.

miriam
06-13-06, 02:42 AM
I think people prefer not to have to think about such things.
I think that the not thinking about such things is a bigger problem than the thinking about such things.

It's amazing how fast many people have an opinion if the don't have to - or are not able to - think. That some of our relative don't want to think about the consequences of a ban on same sex marriages is worrisome. But what is really alarming is that many women with AIS think this doesn't concern them.

Groeten, Miriam

jenny
06-13-06, 10:14 AM
I used to be the type of person that would think this wouldn't affect me, because it is easier to pretend everything is fine. I had to learn the hard way that denial doesn't make a problem go away...it just makes it worse.