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View Full Version : Work, work pressures, forms.


Girlyboy
02-21-03, 03:34 AM
I really like the people I work with. They are nice people most of them. But I don't kid myself that they are open minded enough to treat me the same way if they knew about my condition. I was at a pub today (we were supposed to have a barbeque but it rained for the first time in two years today so it was too wet for a bbq) and a co worker was watching the wreastling. He yelled out 'that guy's got some nice man boob action going there." about the wreastler. Some others chimed in with some crass comments. I just sat there dumbfounded. I wear loose shirts, so I doubt that people have realised I have quite sizable breasts.

My quandry is that without telling people, I have to put up with crap like that, but if I were to tell people I could face some considerable discrimination. This has been the case at school and in other work places. In one work place I was bascly not given any oppertunaties, given boring work, rejected for any training and harrased quite a bit The problem is, the guy who was doing most of the harrassing was a union rep, and also the guy who was supposed to handle harrasment complaints.

How have others gone with regards to work, telling people and so on?

Also, one of my pet peeves is filling in forms where it asks for your sex (It always says sex, never 'gender'). I generally try to leave that blank, but some forms insist on having something there, especially web based forms. I particuarly hate filling in my tax return form as it promises heavy penalties for delibretly or knowingly giving false information on the form.

I get asked to fill in forms reguarly, insurance, driver's licence, internet purchases, credit card request, frequent flyer requests. I'm begining to get really pissed off filling them in. They really cause me a lot of unwanted stress. I see forms, particuarly government forms as society's way of denying my existance, of saying, we do not acknowledge that you or people like you exist.
It is bad enough that the census form has no option other than just male or female. I think that if governments don't give us the option of identifying ourselves, they can justify denying rescources to provide us with some sort of equity. 'You do not exist, there are no numbers on you and your kind, there are no statistics, therefore there are no needs.

I see that women are identified as being a group that has special employment needs. Hemaphrodites and other non gender specific people probably are not equally represented in employment, advancement, training and oppertunaties either. We want to life full lives like everyone else, but we may find it harder to achive our goals, particuarly as many conditions we have also have other associated health problems.

Having said that, I also know that many of us don't let adversity get the better of us, and struggle for better lives, often through self paid education and working hard to prove that we are good workers and worthy of advancement. But I am frustrated that so many of my co-workers must look at me and think, "He can't be serious about work, he never wears a business shirt and tie' He's always wearing a coloured shirt, something not standard." I'm sure if I wore a business shirt with a bra on my employment oppertunaties will melt away faster than they are now.

Opinions? Own experiences?

Glenn
02-21-03, 09:19 AM
You're right, any hint of not being M OR F is clearly threatening to corporate America.
Just to be a brat, I sent a copy of my intersex overview to human resources managers at my company, and submitted it as a research paper to make management aware that the world isn't as black and white as they probably thought. (I work for a big government contractor.)
Naturally, nothing happened from either submission, but I felt better for trying.
Glenn, corrupting the world a little at a time

Jules
02-21-03, 11:01 AM
it takes afar more complex person to play two roles, be proud that you can. and that you know which role is for what

Az1
02-24-03, 02:03 PM
Yes I agree that if i was to wear what they had expected me to wear I too we be a lesser pee-on in Corporate America .
Although in the winter I wear a windbreaker and being small busted
I do not get the stares as if I wore a t shirt to work.
I too have a story about work related incidents.
One , We had a meeting on Sexual Harassment and one of my superiors has always made references to me in the past that I always act feminine , after this meeting he has not made 1 snide comment to me ever since.
Where I live rights are not for IS but everything else under the sun has a right.
Kinda hard to expalin to individuals what gender you are and it is even worse on the empty blank stating what gender I am.

Az1
Muhoe

Az1
02-25-03, 11:54 AM
I was working one morning in the little cubicle that is admantly admired by others as being the elite.
I had an individual couterpart come to me and start talking about people being a tad out of sorts.
I had to laugh a few times because I do not judge individuals in any way shape or form. This individual was bad on discrimination and everyone who enters this persons world.
This individual had said to me that they know where the labels are on feminine clothing so if I had ever flirted with this individual they would know what gender I was. lol

I can say I have had my share of people flirting with me male and female alike. Sometimes this scares me because some of these individulas know I am IS and I think they just want to tease me rather than understand me.
I will tell you this I do not go into an enviroment that I think will harm me. Possibly this is why I am still alive.

Az1
Muhoe