Intersex and not excepted by the GLBTQ's

[IntersexOrange]

jdsf I don't feel like it is safe to come out in my local GLBTQ community, I identify with them but as an Intersex person also. They all think I am Trans but really I feel like I am reclaiming my true sex, yet they define trans e.i. a male trapped in a females body, and I look female and I feel that the sex I should be is male and it was taken unjustly from me. I am not sure what I could do to make it safer for me to come out as the proud Intersex that I long to be. ~Orange

[Betsy]

Hi Orange!

Yours is not an uncommon situation. I wish I had answers for you, but really don't have any. Trust me, I see the same problems within the LGBT community and have never changed my gender. In fact, if I ever get around to posting the Pride Magazine article that Peter has sent me (more than once I might add!---my scanner isn't working and I simply need to remember to take it to a neighbor's house for it), I talk about the issue from the perspective of a lesbian.

Glad to see you around, BTW.

Betsy

[Az1]

jdsf I don't feel like it is safe to come out in my local GLBTQ community, I identify with them but as an Intersex person also. They all think I am Trans but really I feel like I am reclaiming my true sex, yet they define trans e.i. a male trapped in a females body, and I look female and I feel that the sex I should be is male and it was taken unjustly from me. I am not sure what I could do to make it safer for me to come out as the proud Intersex that I long to be. ~Orange

Small world, same here.

Az1

[uriela]

a male trapped in a females body

Hi Intersex Orange,

I've been diagnosed as Trans (i.e. having GID), but never
liked the common notion of being a "female trapped in a
male body". When I last told somebody about it--who only
knew me as female--I told her that I had been raised male
and, when she asked why they did that, told her that it
seemed to be the natural thing to do, given the appearances.

If the doctors had to do anything, I don't know. That part
of my history is hidden from me.

When I was about to become a teenager I hoped my body
would reveal a secret that I was intersex. It did not morph
the way I hoped. I did not begin to menstruate, I did not
grow breasts, my hips did not broaden, etc. etc. My genitals
still looked weird to me, although they were functionally
"male".

I had always felt that I was female, and my "penis" did not
respond the "normal" way. I had to find inventive ways to
make it ejaculate. I suppose I could have gone to a clinic
for male sexual dysfunctionality. (I had gotten married
because I thought it was the "normal" thing to do, within
a year after having an unsuccessful "gay" episode, finally
accepting society's judgment that I was "male" and deciding
I was not "gay".) Belatedly I actually became a successful
sperm donor and my (now) ex-wife gave birth to two girls, two
years apart.

I managed to carry out the charade for years and years, even
marrying a second time. But my sexuality bothered me, as
did the marks on my "penis"--"birth marks", "normal raphe"
(not being a penis connoisseur, I still don't think so). I found
out I had varicocoele in the Army (which caused the doctor
who performed my orchie a lot of consternation, when the
incision kept gushing--the varicocoele was the reason, he
opined, that the second "testicle" had arrested development).

But, it was my body which really "outed" me when I had the
"Big O" the last time I had sex--which now seems a lifetime
ago. (No, it was not from ejaculating--that did not happen.)
People did not remark to me about my feminine mannerisms
and I had tried very hard to be as male as male could be. I
had learned very early to act the role and there was a disconnect
between mind, which was always trying to control my actions
and speech.

My mother had said, before she died, "You were almost a girl,"
which statement had so befuddled me, as well as her partially
paralyzed condition, that I did not pursue her comment. When
I asked my father about it, his response was that my mother
had "taken care of that" and then that "he knew nothing about it"
and told my sister that I was perfectly normal. I have not asked
about it since, being so angry at the time.

There is a tendency among Trans people to try to fit into the
Paradigm. If you "out" yourself among the group you are in, you
would probably be doing others who are in non-paradigmatic
situations to come out themselves, intersex or not.

Welcome to the group!

[Gennie]

It's totally okay to not know what to do. You feel uncomfortable about the situation. But maybe, you should tell them that you are intersex, not a trans, be proud of who you are. There may be others in your community that feel the same. The gay community should start paying more attention to the intersex part of the population, and they should offer support for the intersex at their facilities.
I'm in the process of trying to get the LGBTA, the a is for allies, group at my school to add an I, for intersex. I hope it goes well, because i think that there most likely are a few intersex people here that are searching for support, and need to know that they are okay they way they are, and they the only reason to change is to make themselves happy.
I wish you luck and please know that you are perfect just the way you are and you should be proud of it. I'm bi and in a hetero relationship, but i'm still proud of being bi. It's who i am and i'm not gonna change that to make anyone else sleep easy at night. Be proud to be you!

[bazza]

you are perfect just the way you are and you should be proud of it. !


Hi everyone,
I am Barry I live in the south of the United Kingdom in Brighton,
I’m 44 & was burn in 1961, growing up was a blast to say the lest,
A being a cross-dresser at a very early age & have dun so on & off over the years,
Never rilly new why just something I felt I needed to do,
I have always conceded myself as being 50/50 & yet it was not until I was 38 that I was informed that I had Klinefelters Syndrome 47xxy,
I was put on H.R.T injection’s of 100mgs at first then on to 250mgs every 4 weeks,
But in time as my body (as they put it) got used to it they upped it to every 3, then every 2 weeks, ill not go into any grate detail but just say for 4 years of my life I went to hell & back, & though every emotional feeling & sensation you could imagine,
Without any help from anyone not to say I didn’t try but when u live in the UK if you can find someone how understands what your going though it would be a metrical!

At least now though my own hard work at wonting to understand what being xxy was rilly all about & believe me in it’s self was mind blowing not only do you get a better understanding about ks & its many varying degrees in my search I also find out after thinking all these years that I was 50/50 that I am intersexed woo,
O’ & to also be diagnosed with Gender Dysphoria + Paraphilia, due to taking H.R.T,
Complicated Na not rilly its just life,

It dos not bother me what other ppl think or so much what they say infected I feel sorry for them because of there lack of willingness to understand,
Everyone who knows me knows I’m intersexed or as I put it 50/50 plus that I have weird sensations about myself in a way I sometimes feel I should have breasts & should have been if only in part a women,
Even though I am happy, as I am being a man I will not hide myself away or be something I am not, I am proud to be what I am 50/50 plus.