Day of Remembrance

[Meadow]

Dear Friends at BLO,

Please take a moment with me to think of those who have suffered violent deaths because they were different. Today, 20 November 2005, is the seventh annual Transgender Day of Remembrance, which is recognized internationally.

I have oft times wondered how many persons born intersex may have likewise been killed.

Respectfully,

Meadow

[prince....ss?]

I will keep this day in mind and remember that there were brave individuals who sacrificed much so that others could walk a safer path. Although I am not TS myself, I have learned a lot from the transgender community. I know that my IS condition had me questioning my sex and gender in relation to the physical body, but it was through the careful thought and introspection of others that has help me discover my own self, for that I am grateful.

Prince….ss?

[Peter]

Hi Meadow,

Thanks for your post about Transgender Remembrance Day. I don't know how many intersex people have been the victims of hate crimes.

The other day, I heard a transgender activist say that there are times when it is really really important to have a driver's license, or other id card, that matches one's gender. It can save one's life to be able to point to a driver's license and be able to say, "See, I really am a woman".

I am a big believer in situational ethics. If one is in a life and death situation, where claiming to be intersex might confuse someone long enough to escape to safety, it might work. I know that there are some transgender activists, who recommend that transgender people claim to be intersex in situations that are potentially very dangerous. I am not recommending any course of action, because I am not directly familiar with individual details. But I think that we must be open a wide variety of real life situations.

Peter

[Dana Gold]

It can save one's life to be able to point to a driver's license
transgender activists, who recommend that transgender people claim to be intersex in situations that are potentially very dangerous.
If “they” are really out to “get you”, nothing helps…(pleading, crying, apologizing ...explaining "I'm a human being, hurt noone etc.....not claiming to be intersexed, though) Believe me, I’ve been there/done that,(last year Thanksgiving, young adult and child)... besides....claiming to be intersex is going to help ?….a transgendered/transsexual and/or person who is intersex is a faggot and/or "freak of nature-faggot" in “their” eyes and "they" will definitely fuck you up one way or another.:push: :brick: ....not every human being in this world is like that (violent); however there are many who are and those who aren't would itchingly like to be.....the hate-starers and "mutterers" with potentially "short fuses"....who do not "strike", just hiss.


Dana

[Peter]

Hi Dana,

I was just thinking of your situation as a transgender intersex person. The other day, you recommended that someone get out of the hellhole they are living in, and move somewhere else. I am wondering about you, and thinking that you have remained in the same location through your changes of the past few years. Many people know of your past. If I remember correctly, the attack on you last year was prompted by someone who knew you, outing you at a local store to other people in the store. Only you know the details of your situation, but I am wondering if a change of scenery might do you some good.

Peter

[Dana Gold]

if a change of scenery might do you some good.

I'm sure that it would....and I have often thought about moving (even back to Germany, shortly after I joined BLO). I am legally male and have not had "The Surgery", and I probably never will ....due to the huge cost of extensive skin-graft vaginoplasty (not enough of "supportive tissue/organs" for the "standard" type). And the Real ID Act of 2005 will ensure that wherever I go they will be beholden by law to regard me as male...perhaps even if I were actually to get the vaginoplasty. Because of that it will eventually be known around the new community that I am trans and I would eventually be in the same situation as now.....except: minus friendship and finding/establishing myself in new employment and residence .....in an "unknown environment". Here I "know the territory"...where the safe restrooms are, who and where the friendlies are....and I have a few friends and am well-established employment-wise....and I have finally found a safe place of residence in a relatively accepting neighborhood...after having to move twice because of my "transsexual status" and struggle to find a place that would take me in....I fought hard for all those things and realistically having to "start all over again" would be too much for me, as it was already so stressful to get what I have today. Through my own efforts I have been able to change the initial hellhole into a better place, with the help of friends and allies; something not guaranteed if I were to move somewhere entirely different.....and I'm tired of that struggle...I'm 55 yrs old and sick of moving and fighting....it's the little voice, the one that whispers "life on Planet Earth is screwed" that brings out the emotions to RUN....get out of here!! when something negative (homo-trans phobic related) happens.....it's a personal challenge for me to not give up what I have earned the hard way.

Additionally, the negative experiences of the past and the "Thank-taking" assault have , ironically taught me valuable lessons.....that to be very careful and heed my intuitive thoughts and feelings (as Meadow pointed out in another thread) is a useful safety mechanism if applied/exercised judiciously in the interest of safety and well-being....if I had listened to my feelings first, the assault would have never occurred, pride kept me there despite the emanating bad vibes ...a retreat out of a potentially dangerous situation is not necessarily an abdication of rights or submittal to loss....at least for me.

I think a lot of people are in a similar life situation as me and will understand what I'm talking about.....perhaps the person I encouraged to "get the hell out of Dodge" feels the same way I have stated, too....I don't know. I just said what was on my mind at the moment.

Anyway, I've jammered a little too long, time to go home ( 5 PM-off ) and thank you for your concern, Peter.

Dana

[CC]

Meadow wrote
Please take a moment with me to think of those who have suffered violent deaths because they were different. Today, 20 November 2005, is the seventh annual Transgender Day of Remembrance, which is recognized internationally.

Crossing boundaries and paying for it . ..

http://www.poppolitics.com/archives/2005/11/never_forget_1.html

CC