Hello from the Midwest

[keria]

Hey all. I first visited Bodies Like Ours about two years ago when I started exploring my own gender identity/feelings about being intersexed and am glad I'm back!

I'm 20, a Junior in college, and was born with XY chromosomes, neither set of genitalia, and was assigned female at birth. I am content (I think that's the best word for it) as a straight female. I've been on hormone treatment (estrogen only) for about 7 years.

Crazy thing is that while I've had two genital reconstruction surgeries, because of other medical stuff, there have been a lot of complications and I still need to undergo another surgery so I'm able to have "vaginal" sex. Right now, I'm curious about the issue of sexuality within the intersex community. I'm dating a guy right now and am out to him, which is amazing. Our relationship is really serious (If things keep going as they are we'll probably get married within two years). He is a great guy and loves me for who I am, but I'm still a bit self-conscious about my own sexuality with him. Any thoughts?

One more question. Have any of you come out publicly as being intersexed? Is there any benefit to doing this?

[Kailana]

Hmmm, i have come out publicly locally as intersexed, i have found that i have gotten a great deal of acceptance.

something that i feared, of being treated like crap or being harrassed, none of that has happened yet. Generally i've beeen treated well. i do get a few odd looks now and then, sometimes some stares, but overall, not to bad out in public.

On the other hand, Within the medical community i generally get treated like crap. not always but usually. i have actually had better luck within the religous community then in the medical community.

Im happy for you that you have serioous boyfriend who sees you for you. by the way welcome to BLO again.

[fraulein_Maria]

Hey all. I first visited Bodies Like Ours about two years ago when I started exploring my own gender identity/feelings about being intersexed and am glad I'm back!

>>> welcome back :) drop on by the AIS board... too quiet over there :)<<

One more question. Have any of you come out publicly as being intersexed? Is there any benefit to doing this?

>>> if by public you mean taken a full page ad in the paper out, no. :) But All my friends now know, and my boss knows, my co-workers know, and my church knows, and i wear a bracelet from the caresfoundation (CAH).
The benefit inso far as a CAH'er is concerned, is that folks now know... that i have a potentially life threatening condition... which BTW has masculinized my XX body.

I can't tell you what benefit there may be for you... except to say that living a closeted existence is something i understand... though i would never choose it for myself.

[sparklingdreams]

...i have found that i have gotten a great deal of acceptance...
...Within the medical community i generally get treated like crap...
Welcome back,

Seems like a lot of us here take vacations from BLO,

Only to come back. I've had Kailana's experience. As far as coming out publicly, it's not like I wear an 'I'm intersex T-Shirt' or anything ;) but I've told those around me, discussed on the public transit system, and a few years ago when I was still able to... I gave a very detailed speech on being intersex in one of my classes and even though what I talked about spread through my school in like two days, until even the Dean had heard about. Everyone was very accepting.

Accept for the school's administration. Once I talked about they setup rules about when I would be allowed to use the restroom, and I was expelled from school because I refused to do as I was told.

So for the most part coming out has never really meant much to most people. Accept people in some sort of control. It caused tension at one of my jobs (which I believed lead to my termination), resulted in expulsion from school, and gets me treated like shit by medical professionals, at least those that don't understand.

I'm going to start seeing an endo who specializes in CAH and is familiar with intersex conditions, so I'm hoping for better treatment than what I've been getting from my current GP. At least provided my GP is decent enough to provide me with a referral to see, since I'm on medicaid only I have to have a referral to see any kind of specialist.

These have been my experiences', hopefully others have had better & sadly I'm sure others too; have had far worse.

[Jayballa]

Hey all. I first visited Bodies Like Ours about two years ago when I started exploring my own gender identity/feelings about being intersexed and am glad I'm back!

I'm 20, a Junior in college, and was born with XY chromosomes, neither set of genitalia, and was assigned female at birth. I am content (I think that's the best word for it) as a straight female. I've been on hormone treatment (estrogen only) for about 7 years.

Crazy thing is that while I've had two genital reconstruction surgeries, because of other medical stuff, there have been a lot of complications and I still need to undergo another surgery so I'm able to have "vaginal" sex. Right now, I'm curious about the issue of sexuality within the intersex community. I'm dating a guy right now and am out to him, which is amazing. Our relationship is really serious (If things keep going as they are we'll probably get married within two years). He is a great guy and loves me for who I am, but I'm still a bit self-conscious about my own sexuality with him. Any thoughts?

One more question. Have any of you come out publicly as being intersexed? Is there any benefit to doing this?
Hi this is in response to Keria's last post. Hi. First off i just want to say that this is the first time ive ever been on anything like this and secondly i can finally say that " i am not alone". Reading your post was like reading my own life story; accept the relationship part :( . But anyways i was wondering if i could maybe talk with you to kinda help me deal with this. Im not sure this is the proper way of going about this but i hope i hear from you soon. Thanks!

[keria]

Jayballa, did you get my message?

[Kailana]

Hello Keria i hopoe things are going ok.

And yes id love to wear a T-shirt, Maybe i'll make my own.

"Hermaphrodite with a bad attitude" Doctor's should of left me alone" or
something nicer
"just ask im actually quite an interesting person"
or Confrontational
"Staring isn't nice, I'm still human, True hermaphrodite just trying to find my place in society".
Spiritual,
"God made everyone different, Cherish my difference it's heaven sent".
supportive.
"Body's like ours, intersexed peer support and gender awareness organization"

Something along those lines.

For keria again im glad your doing ok, and should you choose to come out or not as intersexed well thats up too you. Sometimes some good can come from it, sometimes some bad. I hope you will find good people to be around. you never know though sometimes one can find or meet some of the most ignorant people one has ever met. Best wishes

[JOS]

Hello Keria,

In my experience it is not always what you tell people but how and when you tell them that affects their response. In the past I've had bad reactions because I've told people who were random strangers personal information too soon....

"actually I'm not really female so don't call me miss and yes I would like fries with that!"

..... so I stopped telling everyone. Just wish I'd thought of the T-shirt idea first!!!
I used to think that I had to tell people otherwise I'd be misleading them..... the irony is that I actually only found out the "truth" myself recently and what I'd told everyone was the pack of lies I'd been fed!!

Anyway, don't be prejudiced against yourself, everyone is a bit self-conscious about their sexuality when they're getting to know someone they feel a lot for, even boring "Normo's"

JOS

[Glenn]

great T shirt ideas! Cafepress, anyone?