I was wondering...

[prince....ss?]

I agree with you and you make some excellent points. For the most part I have done the same and went on with my life. I have my faults and I am still hung up on a few things but time will work them out.

I don’t know about the rest of you but for me TRUST is the most important thing to me in any relationship. By saying relationship this includes family, friends, persons you do business with and basically any person I come into contact with. So everyone is given a certain amount of trust and that amount of trust can grow. But for me if I get lied to or wronged just once that’s it. I don’t trust them and I hate to say but they will never gain that trust back. I may forgive but I never forget. I have found that most people that lie and do things of mistrust continue with that behavior. So once a liar always a liar!!!

Keep in mind the folks here that are searching for answers about themselves and have parents and doctors lying to them and withholding information, it is not something you can just say Stop, No more to. It is not something you can just move on from. This is important information that you need to survive.

Think of it as sitting in the middle of the ocean on a raft with ores. You have no food and little water. If you say Stop, no more to this situation and just start rowing, well I hope you see my point. But if you had one piece of information, say a compass, your chances for survival have increased. If you had a GPS device and a map even better.

So I agree with you and hopefully one day we will all find our way home. But if you don’t know which way to row you may never find your way.

[Priestess]

I'm sure princess's answer might be different, but ...
The truth is the truth, and has a slowly growing body of medical evidence to back it up. I may not challenge them on the points very often, but it will never be dropped from my side. That would be like agreeing to "the moon is just the sun at night ...".

I'm not looking for unconditional love from my birth family. I already knew that they never loved me. Now I know it was because in their eyes I had been born a freak of nature, and surgery only disguised it. The lies were not to protect me, but to protect themselves from being blamed for what they did. And they don't want my love or ask for forgiveness.

[Andre]

The lies were not to protect me, but to protect themselves from being blamed for what they did. And they don't want my love or ask for forgiveness.

Then give to someone more deserving. Eventually, you will be faced with this again if you don't resolve it within yourself.

I wish you all the courage and energy I can muster. I truly wish you well. I wish there was more I can say or do, it's hard when my words are on the opposite side looking in. I can only point you in the right direction, you have to do the walking yourself, sweety. I am always around if you want to lean and I offer this without judgment and without conditions.

Andre

[Andre]

After a brief thought and reflection on how I am answering you folks, I have come to realise that it may seem that what I say is the only way. It is not. These are merely suggestions, how you go about resolving issues and problems is completely up to you.

All I want to do is give you another opinion, one from the outside, if you will. My blended personality sees no boundaries and no walls that cannot be conquered. I see a goal and I get it, nothing but the advice from my wife will stop me. I am in a better place but it took work, a heck of a lot of it and it's not finished. I guess I'll stop when my body gives out.

I really feel for the lot of you. I have physical problems of my own (who doesn't) and being xxy gives me some problems all xy's can't even fathom. I wouldn't want to take it back, I am okay with it. I just want the best for all that I meet, I mean no harm.

[prince....ss?]

Your thoughts and suggestions are great and we appreciate them greatly. My comments are just an explanation of one side of this hexagon. So your suggestions and comments give us an opportunity to look closer at the problem. By examining the problem then you can start to find solutions. Unfortunately, not all problems are fixable. So I hope you don’t feel like we were ganging up on you. This is just a difficult reality that some of us have to deal with, and the one barrier between us and wellness.

The good news is this conversation will run and rerun in our minds and perhaps one comment , thought or perception will be a directional marker to where we want and need to go.

[Andre]

So I hope you don’t feel like we were ganging up on you. This is just a difficult reality that some of us have to deal with, and the one barrier between us and wellness.

Princess,

I don't feel like you folks are ganging up on me, I don't feel that way at all. What you said about some problems having no fix to them is completely true. These are difficult realities to believe in never mind live them.

Thanks for your support, princess. I just had a thought that here I am going like gang busters when the reality is that it starts slow. It takes 21 days to create a habit, that much time to replace one as well.

I tell you this because I went through some tough times in regards to that, without saying more, anger management has taught me a lot about myself and other issues. Some I am still working on, like I said earlier.

[Priestess]

Andre, I'm sorry also, for being aggravating.
Yes, sometimes these can be hard realities to believe in. I used to be somewhat skeptical myself, it's something for me to ashamed of that haven't always taken people here at their word, only to find a history of myself which is so unlikely that 5 years ago I wouldn't have believed someone who said it. I think this is a result of the general atmosphere of secrecy, that we don't believe just how aweful the truth can be.

[Andre]

Andre, I'm sorry also, for being aggravating.

You weren't, just untrusting. That's okay, just last week you didn't know me from a hole in the wall. All I had going for me was a site that I moderate and Princess backing me up.

I talk like this to everyone, but I especially want to help where there is hurt. I hurt too, where mine has gone for the most part, there is still some left.

Princess hit it bang on, TRUST. I normally trust people right off but I do so with some reservations and caution. I am expecting others to fail me, when it happens, I am slightly disappointed, if it doesn't then it's a welcoming surprise.

Hang in there, Priestess, there are some here that are rooting for you and actually in your corner. Count me in as one.

[Andre]

I like this site. People here are different and I truly like different. Most give me another perspective and I am always learning. Here I can be myself, as I am in the other site. No one will judge me here of being too girly or too masculine, I really don't see that happening.

So while I spread myself out on this comfy couch, I would like to say that I admire all of you for your courage in posting here and your compassion for others. I still have a lot of reading to do and I'll take my time.

Earl Grey please, with two lumps, thankyou.