When do you tell?

[Priestess]

Even if it's purely social like a first date, 99% of normal people are turned off by knowing about intersex. If they say it's not a problem, that's because they're trying to be polite. Telling someone on the first date tends to leave the impression that you are assuming that the relationship is going end up between the sheets, which is the only place where the physical reality matters. And telling her before it appears necessary (in her eyes) says that you have issues on the subject. And when someone is making their first impression of you and hasn't had the chance to feel real desire, that's all it takes to kill things before they began.

(as an expert in how /not/ to find love in this world, I certainly have learned many of the ways to fail)