Hi there!

First, I´d like to ask how you deal with your sense of alienation and problems/depressions related to intersexed conditions?

As ISNA does not offer any psychological help - as far as I know -, and as f.ex my partner are reluctant to see any psychiatrists - who themselves does not seem to be very aware of intersex at all! - (?)... then what do you do??
Are there any support groups or self-recovery groups for intersexed? I mean, I think it would help a lot of intersexed if people gathered together and TALKED about their problems, to break the silence, their sense of alienation and "freakyness".

Me and my partner do talk about IS - occassionally - but I believe that "she" actually need to MEET and SEE other intersexed people, as she is rather isolated up here in Sweden with her intersexed condition (CAH). It would be really nice if she could meet some of you people in the US, get together and talk ... or if some of you came by Sweden. You could stay in our place then...

On relationships, sex and such: I can only speak fo myself, but I believe that it is not really sexual problems that is the main problem here. The real problem/danger in a relationship - as in all relationships both straight and/or queer ones - are lack of communication. If you aren´t able to talk to each other about intersex and problems related to it, then it will be difficult to build a lasting relationship. Now, I know that many feel shame and fear of rejection to reveal the truth, as you are not used to talk about this at all, but the reason why they reject you is that they themselves are not able to deal with the truth. It has then more to do with themselves than with you. It is not for you to take responsability for other peoples reactions.
If they take it well, fine, if they don´t, well that´s a pity, but don´t blame yourself for it! It is actually their problem, not yours!

Best regards Ana

There are both CAH and AIS societies in the UK which is probably a little closer to you. They both hold meetings ( not very regular I am afraid) but they always respond to any emails with questions sent. I am am a memeber of the UK AIS group and would love to chat with anyone who is willing.