A member suggested I may have CAH

[Rycharde]

Ok so I described my situation on my intro post.

Someone read it and suggested I look into this so I've been reading and hmm well some bells go off.

I was in a coma May 05 said to be brought on by flushing my sodium levels to rates that caused me to go into seizures and almost die.
They said it was because I drank so much water that I had no sodium and I was restricted from drinking water when I woke up from my coma!
So how much water does it take to flush all the sodium out of a person my size?
I was told 86 liters, but don't quote me on it.

I have been sent for Rheumatoid testing because my joints are gone. I'm only 24.
I've got a million other health issues too.

The condition of my body is "Stopped at 12" no puberty, no masculine features, no feminine features.
Mom, #1 Aunt and Grandma physically resemble me, Aunt #2 is short fat and curvy with huge breasts. Not like us at all.

I have been living as a boy all my life, I have taken supplements to raise my testosterone levels and on a scale of 1-10 my doctor conveyed man as 10 and woman as 1, he scored my level as a 5.9.

I've had 2 live full term births, both conceived on birth control pills. My current pregnancy was conceived while taking supplements, the supplements I took also raised my estrogen. I don't know how but my doc said that I was ovulating normally and I got a period so I had intercourse and yay I'm pregnant. Otherwise I don't get periods and I had been in a relationship with a man for 5 years of unprotected intercourse with no conception, although he and I had a baby when I was on the pill.

Now I want to figure out if CAH is something I might have. But I want to be masculine. I want to be a man the rest of my life, as I have always been (aside from lapses in sanity where I actually tried to be a woman LOL)

BUT if I DO have CAH does that mean that I'm going to have doctors trying to level me out by giving me ewww estrogen and making me female! I'd rather die a man than have someone help me turn into a woman.
I can not express my hatred for being thought of as a woman enough in words except that my inability to express how much I hate the idea of living as a woman makes me want to destroy things and hurt myself and others. That's how seriously I do not want anything to do with being female.

I LOVE being feminine. I am a gay man,I am a flamer and I do drag and I get called a lady because I'm one of the girls but get it right that when it comes to who I am, I am a feminine Man, with a vagina.

Other key points hmm- no real clitoral enlargement. It's kinda big but not really, the big part is where I urinate from which comes out an inch or two when erect.
Pregnant and muscle walls still in tact, females muscles move to the side when they get pregnant, I'm 6 months, no change in their position, they never separate. My hips are still where they always were, they never separate and my joints pop and hurt like hell.
Lately I am having trouble urinating. Slow and steady. It takes a good 10 mins to get the job done.
No vaginal orgasm, anal orgasm, clitoral and the area around my urethral opening are sensitive, but nothing up in the major cavity.
My jaw didn't grow and my teeth got too big for my jaw.
I have seizures that cause my whole left side to go numb and I lose all ability to speak in normal sentences.
EVERYTHING feels better when I have high testosterone. No more Manic Depression, joints feel better, no seizures, healthy feeling.
I have a light and soft spoken voice by choice but can belt out bass if I barrel it from my chest, I don't because I'm a sweetie and it scares people when I yell because I'm so cute and little...I sound like Ross the Intern!!!!
My voice got really low when I took supplements, really fast too but I can still speak lightly because of my natural way of speaking.
I was supposed mentally retarded at age 8 and found to be top 98% IQ (over 160) and then they said I have ADD, then they said I have Aspergers, then they said I don't and they don't know what is wrong, I don't like "them" at all.

So what does it sound like to you, people who have dealt with CAH for how long and know a lot about it?

And again I don't want to get tested for CAH if it means I won't get testosterone if I have it.
If I don't get my T I don't want to be alive. So risks, ah well, die happy. I just want to grow up as a normal man.

I don't know what else to say or ask but I hope someone can point me in the right direction and broaden my understanding, I have read the pages in the links on this forum and I don't see anything that answers "what if I like being a man and have CAH?" So I'm asking.

If it sounds like I have something other than CAH to you, what is it? Point me please!

[miriam]

Rycharde, for a diagnosis, you'll have to go to a doctor. For more information about coping with a high IQ, you can read what Wikipedia is saying about High IQ societies.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/High_IQ_society

Groeten, Miriam

[Rycharde]

Read, please. I don't want to go to a doctor and I don't want to hear you tell me I have an identity crisis.

And I don't want you posting an end all post like that which will discouage other people from actually HELPING me.

I'm not stupid. Obviously because I have a high IQ and thats not what I asked for help with.


If I got diagnosed with CAH would a doctor prescibe me testosterone if I wanted it?
I don't want anything but testosterone in me as I live as a male full time and wish to grow a huge beard, be hairy as a bear, smelly, sweaty and muscular. Not taking T would cramp that a little doncha think?

I'd never get diagnosed with anything that will prevent me from being prescribed my hormones.
So I don't want to go and have it checked if I might get told not to take T.

I don't care about my length of life or if I am sick the rest of my life as long as I can live as myself.

I hope this has been clearly stated that what I need to know concidering I have many CAH symptoms is if this will stop my FTM Transition.

[miriam]

Now I want to figure out if CAH is something I might have

If you really want to figure it out, you'll have to go to a doctor. I'm sorry if this is not the answer you want to hear. Even for a medical professional it would be impossible to diagnose you with CAH (or not) with only the information you gave in your post.

That said, I wonder why testosterone would be a problem for you if you would be diagosed with CAH. But I'm not an expert on CAH.

Groeten, Miriam

[Rycharde]

Thank you, then why don't we just let someone who is an expert answer that ok?

[apple]

Originally Posted by Rycharde

Thank you, then why don't we just let someone who is an expert answer that ok?

Excellent idea Rycharde.

So then go see a doctor like Miriam so kindly and patiently has advised you.

It doesn't take a genius to know, that in order to obtain a real diagnosis, you must see a qualified physician.

Now lets see you use that big ass IQ of yours OK?



Heavens sake!

Your head: It's more than just a place to wear your hairstyle.

[Rycharde]

Well this big IQ of mine says that (although you may not like me being here because of it) that some people may consider me as trans.

I was raised to be allowed to be anything I want. And despite politics I don't want to grow up into a woman, I want to grow up into a man. I don't consider this being trans because it's not a transition.

I am here to LEARN about a condition BEFORE I see a doctor so I am prepared and have an understanding of what the condition implies prior to having medical treatment.

Also like I stated, no matter what my condition is, I feel that I need my testosterone.

The simple question I want answered is because CAH is an adrenal disorder, how would that effect being prescribed testosterone to further my masculinity?

The fact is I am very masculine in mind and quite masculine in body, I like myself this way and wish to continue growing as a man.

So if you feel like you are warding off another tranny until you see me come on here with some tests that say I'm IS from a doctor then that's just plain rude.
I know a lot of trannys get jealous of people who are born with some decent explanation for having wanting to be of the opposite sex but then why would I choose to pretend I have CAH to make myself justified, that is just stupid.

I wanted to be a little boy far before any disorder would have had a masculine effect on me, I'm just plain male gendered- regardless of medical condition and confident with it.

So here I go using that huge IQ of mine to cut that apart and I'd like to request that the community here help me in learning about how transmen with CAH are treated and the risks/medical issues involved in being treated with cortisone AND testosterone. If a doctor would be against that.

I have advised my mother who I have not spoken to for over a year of the existence of CAH through an aunt in the medical profession, she has been very sick the last five years and doctors can't figure out why. Sometimes she can't even breathe. She won't let me in on her conditions but I know she's been on a hundred different hormones and pills and crazy stuff that doctors can't figure out what is wrong with her.
Maybe she has CAH and maybe you just saved her life.

I'm here to learn, I'm not asking you to diagnose me. I know only a doctor can do that.

I want to know the consequences of this diagnosis on my life as a man and how it will effect me maturing into a normal male.

And I want to add, that it feels really crappy to be turned away and given a cold shoulder by jealous trans men and IS people who accuse me of being just another jealous tranny. It hurts you know. I'm human and I have a right to learn.

[apple]

Originally Posted by Rycharde

Well this big IQ of mine says that (although you may not like me being here because of it) that some people may consider me as trans.

I was raised to be allowed to be anything I want. And despite politics I don't want to grow up into a woman, I want to grow up into a man. I don't consider this being trans because it's not a transition.

I am here to LEARN about a condition BEFORE I see a doctor so I am prepared and have an understanding of what the condition implies prior to having medical treatment.

Also like I stated, no matter what my condition is, I feel that I need my testosterone.

The simple question I want answered is because CAH is an adrenal disorder, how would that effect being prescribed testosterone to further my masculinity?

The fact is I am very masculine in mind and quite masculine in body, I like myself this way and wish to continue growing as a man.

So if you feel like you are warding off another tranny until you see me come on here with some tests that say I'm IS from a doctor then that's just plain rude.

I know a lot of trannys get jealous of people who are born with some decent explanation for having wanting to be of the opposite sex but then why would I choose to pretend I have CAH to make myself justified, that is just stupid.

I wanted to be a little boy far before any disorder would have had a masculine effect on me, I'm just plain male gendered- regardless of medical condition and confident with it.

So here I go using that huge IQ of mine to cut that apart and I'd like to request that the community here help me in learning about how transmen with CAH are treated and the risks/medical issues involved in being treated with cortisone AND testosterone. If a doctor would be against that.

I'm here to learn, I'm not asking you to diagnose me. I know only a doctor can do that.

I want to know the consequences of this diagnosis on my life as a man and how it will effect me maturing into a normal male.

And I want to add, that it feels really crappy to be turned away and given a cold shoulder by jealous trans men and IS people who accuse me of being just another jealous tranny. It hurts you know. I'm human and I have a right to learn.

Hi Rycharde,

I do understand your concern about the medical implications of CAH and, .... sorry I have to say it, because I can't even dream up a way to say it, without saying it, ..... your desire to receive transformative (is that a word?) testosterone treatment to become a man physically.

I am not "anti-trans", and personally I believe that applying gender deconstructionist logic to such affairs of the heart, psyche/soul, is rather pointless. However, .... since I myself am 'not smart' and lack fancy educational credentials, .... I will yet try to apply a touch of (what I call) logic, in a limited way, to "gender". I will however do so, in a way in which I intend as helpful, rather than merely dismissive.

From my perspective, gender is wholly insubstantial, having no objectively quantifiable substance, and really the sole problem with "it", is that society seeks to place objective criteria upon "something" which is subjective and deeply personal, as if "it" is somehow real, being even also oddly "sacred" and of immense importance, and in my book that is nothing short of stupid.

So then, there's "the rub of the green" as applied to ping-pong, which results in those whose "sexual appearance" and or "gender behavior" is at odds with any one of the many widely varying arbitrary "standards", .... being told that they may not enter the "country club" at all, .... or in "better circumstance", being forced to endure limited probationary membership.

I am, BION =), trying to be concise and brief, and yet I think it may be helpful to you if I add the following.

In my case, as one born 'other', to this very day I find that I am often unable to fit, within the narrow and artificial criteria for "correct gender behavior" arbitrarily designated, for either males 'or' females, and physically, depending upon how closely I am examined, I do not fit the "male or female" criteria "medically" either.

As you know, "behavioral standards" vary by location, and "appearance standards" do also. How my physical appearance will be judged, depends upon, how large a magnifying glass ->or<- how heavy an 'ax to grind', is being carried by the local Sex and Gender Paradigm Enforcement Agency [SAGPEA] agents, at any particular place in time.

Now please bear in mind that the SAGPEA recruits from among those of all "races", ethnicities, social "classes", and any sort of background one can possibly imagine, and they wear no uniform, carry no credentials of any kind, and they have no operations guidelines or even limitations upon their power or authority. They have no rules, no badges, and they can and will do to you, whatever they like and believe they can get away with, in any given time and place. They make the SS and DHS look like newly born kittens by comparison.

The following locations, are where one will find the highest ranking and most ruthless among SAGPEA agents, on high alert 24/7 365, and I have placed them in rough order of their potential ruthless severity.

Gay Space - Wimyn Space - Man Space - Tranny Space - Intersex Space - Normal Space - Special Undesignated Other Space - Left Space - Right Space- Middle Space - Traditional Space - Non Transitional Space - Religious Space - Non Religious Space - Theist Space - Non Theist Space - Atheist Space - Old Space - New Space - Rich Space - Poor Space - Middle Income Space - Urban Space - Suburban Space - Rural Space - Edge-u-ma-cated (sic) Space - Sophisticated Space - Spaced Out Space - Academic Space - Medical Space - Space Not Otherwise Specified Space .... and ... you know, the way things are in this stupid universe, very likely even - Outer Space - as well.

Rycharde, I really do also understand, that one may become somewhat traumatized, hence sensitized or even weaponized or at the very least a bit defensive, because of all the crap, anyone, intersexed or not, has to endure at the hands of SAGPEA agents. I apologize for this, even though it is not my fault, and I further understand it is not your fault either. It is just the way it is. Let us try to communicate therefor.

Miriam was just trying to tell you, that there really is no way to predict how a "doctor" will react to you, within your circumstances, and only a doctor can diagnosis you.

Please, try to understand, that many people come here seeking that which we cannot give. It is not that we will not, or that we refuse to, but rather it is that we simply can not.

I can offer, the following advice, about how to limit potential psychic trauma in your endeavor though.

Try not to mention your high IQ. It is not that anyone will resent you for actually being more intelligent than others. No really it is that others will immediately be flagged by such an, unintelligent and therefor self contradicting, assertion, even though you are surely more intelligent than that, and probably even more intelligent than even you really know. It's just so wholly unnecessary. =)

I advise against any statements, even remotely like, "don't hate me because I am more intelligent than you are", .... or ..... "don't hate me me because I am more beautiful than you are" ..... or .... "don't hate me because I am more legitimate, valid or whatever, than you, or even 'they', are".

Such statements tend to put others off from the outset, perhaps even especially more so here, because such really appear to come from someone seeking acceptance, in addition to legitimization, even also from among those of us here .... whom you aparently just presume to be both unintelligent 'and' stiffly snobbish.

See what I mean? We are not a bunch of stuffed shirts and bigots, who feel ourselves to be above trans people, having a "special club" we just refuse to admit you too. =)

I think we got off on a "bad foot", and a short breather is called for before resuming.

[Rycharde]

Apple, I am so tired right now and hardly grasped anything you said since I am half asleep.
I was not trying to say my IQ is higher because I'm better than anyone. Sorry if it sounded that way. But I just mentioned everything that I could think of about me.
I.E. High IQ- ADD and Aspergers misdiagnoses, enlarged meatus, coma caused by not having enough saline, only being able to get pregnant on birth control.

Thankfully I've learned SO MUCH from some awesome people, more links I've been sent more conversations and things.

I'm pregnant with a boy, and now I'm going to have him tested for CAH which might save his life *hard emotional hit* thinking if he does get a CAH diagnosis and what if I didn't know about this...what if he died one night?

I looked at the prader scale and my genitalia appears to be a number 2.

I was so shocked when I saw it. Like OMG that's what mine looks like, someone knows what this is! Finally!!!

My friend has convinced me to look into it medically for the sake of my children.
I don't know what else would cause the things that I have.
I am most definitely sure after discussing what prader 2 looks, feels and behaves like with a prader 2 individual that this is how my body is. I have no doubt in my mind that my genitalia is this.
It was a quite extensive and detailed discussion and I am thankful that someone had contacted me to discuss this who was not shy on the details.

If there is another condition that may have caused a prader 2 genital formation or something like it, please tell me. If you know.

It is an amazing thing, sex, gender, orientation.

Let me just close by speaking about differences and similarities. Many normal biological men can compare their puberty, their genitals, and their sexual sensations and be identical in those areas. One might be a female gendered transsexual who wants to be a woman and the other may be straight as an arrow and very masculine.
The person I talk to is the very same as me as far as the way our genitals are placed, the way we felt during puberty and many other things.
Separate from that, I wish to live as a male, my correspondent did not chose to live as a male. We have similar conditions, I just lead a different life and have different feelings about how I want to live my life. And just as we are different as we live in different countries and are of different ages, we still share that common tie.

I am sorry again that I came on wrong. I don't understand much at this point but the point is I want to learn, I will finish reading your post in full, Apple, when I am not so...taken by other desires such as sleep at this moment. I felt it important to express the above before retiring while it was fresh. Thank you for your attention and concern.